As always, I am involved in many activities inside and outside of school. I volunteer with Horses Make Miracles, a non-profit horse facility, when I can get out there to spend some time with the horses. I am working on a project called The Wailing Wall. Feel free to to to Horse Wisdom Ranch to learn more about one of my big visions for co-housing and trauma resolution.
I am always available to speak in regard to issues that affect the homeless and talk about my own experiences. Having my story in the book, Until They Have Faces, has given me some opportunities to appear on panels and speak to direct care providers about understanding trauma in their clients.
As the founder of the student group, Sacred Sex Salon, I am working on an event at Paramita on Tuesday, March 11th, from 4 – 7 PM. It is a workshop entitled ‘Reproductive Rights and Responsibilities,’ featuring Lisa Radelet of the Boulder Valley Women’s Health Clinic, and Rachael Uris, a Naropa graduate whose counseling practice focuses on preparing for and healing from abortion. Lisa will talk about the history of women’s rights and the current political environment. I also assist our SSS group leader with marketing materials and conduct some of our meetings during the semester.
I’ve finally found the perfect business consultant to take my businesses to the next level and will be working with him throughout this semester to enhance personal income and public presence in my field of sexual healing.
I continue to struggle with Environmental Illness and Multiple Chemical Sensitivity. I drove to Austin over winter break and walked into a home that was full of mold from the flood there in October. I became very ill and had to cancel plans for events and sessions and come back early. I am still recovering from the effects of so much driving and the mold exposure. I am much more reactive to other triggers right now and am finding it difficult to maintain energy and attention for school and school work, in addition to earning a living and meeting my other commitments. My pain levels have been much higher since returning from my trip.
The trauma therapy (primarily EMDR) that I’ve been doing off and on since the fall of 2010 has helped me in so many ways. My brain function is better than it has been in many years, but there are still days when I am too exhausted to do much. My energy levels fluctuate wildly. I am usually drained by mid-afternoon and pretty useless by 6 pm or so. I am taking the Learning from Trauma class from noon to 3 on Thursdays, just before this PAX class' It is a large class and the subject matter is hard for me to sit with. I’m thrilled to be in the class, but am experiencing exhaustion from just having to manage the triggers that arise.
This healing journey with trauma has helped me understand my chaotic life from a much different perspective, and the integration process is bringing back to me many of the things I lost as a child. I feel I have much revived potential in these next years to write about my life and my work and to be in teaching environments, as well as finish some of my writing projects and *finally* get published.
I’m also working on a four week series for the Senior Center in Longmont, called Sacred Sex for Seniors. Dr. Joseph Cohen will be joining me to offer the bio-identical hormones piece. This will hopefully be offered next fall, if we can get the proposal approved by the committee. I have spent a good amount of time on this, as I needed to develop the curriculum for the proposal.
The semester that I took off, last spring, was full of losses. Mark Miller, my best friend from Junior High, in January; an uncle in February; a cousin in early March and then the worst of all. On March 26th a young man whose birth I had attended 15 years ago was found dead from an accidental drug overdose. His mother called me right after she called 911 and I was immersed with her for several weeks. I would not have been able to stay in school if I had been in classes. I realize that this is normal as we age, but I’ve had a lot of loss in my life and most of it happens in winter and early spring, it seems. I did an 8 week grief support workshop offered by hospice, and that helped a lot, to be around others with recent deaths of loved ones. I’m more committed than ever to the Wailing Wall project.
So, I’m feeling fragile and exhausted and need to take really good care of myself. Sometimes that means napping instead of reading – well, I start out reading – and doing things that are not computer-intensive. The horses help me so much when I can get out there. I know things are getting better, but it goes slowly.